“We strain to hear.  But instead of hearing an answer we catch sight of God himself scraped and torn.  Through our tears we see the tears of God.”

“Faith is a footbridge that you don’t know will hold you over the chasm until you’re forced to walk out onto it.”

– Nicholas Wolterstorff – Lament for a Son

MARK SCHUMANN

Early Saturday morning, Cole Coppola, 16, was killed while bicycling with friends across the Alma Lee Loy Bridge. According to police reports, Cole was hit by a car driven by Jamie Nicole Williams, 21, also of Vero Beach. Williams was arrested and charged with felony DUI manslaughter, possession of less than 20 grams of marijuana and possession of drug paraphernalia.

Cole, the son of Dr. Nicholas Coppola, attended John Carroll High School, where he played football and lacrosse.

Since learning of Cole’s death, all I have been able to think about is the deep, unspeakable loss and suffering of his family and friends, as well as the tragic turn in the life of a young woman, who must now face the consequences of what she has done.

Cole’s death has stirred in me 20-year-old memories of the most difficult and painful week I experienced while serving as associate pastor at Palma Ceia Presbyterian Church in Tampa. That week, a young man in the congregation took his own life.  In the sermon I offered the following Sunday, Where is your God?, I drew from Lament for a Son, a deeply personal memoir by Nicholas Wolterstorff, written after his son was killed in a mountain climbing accident.

About Lament for a Son, Catholic theologian Henri Nouwen wrote, “To those who are left behind, the death of a friend or family member is a beginning as much as an end. For the author of this book, who lost his 25-year-old son Eric in a mountain climbing accident, it meant the start of a long, unwanted journey to come to terms with his grief — and the “unanswered questions” of his wounded spirit. Lament for a Son avoids easy answers about suffering. Its honest depiction of one man’s struggle will help open the floodgates for those who cannot find words for their own pain.”

Nothing anyone can do will change what happened early this morning on a bridge in Vero Beach. Bad choices were made. A young life has been lost. Those who knew and loved and cared for Cole will each grieve their loss in their own way and in their own time.  To the extent they can sense the loving support of a larger community sharing in their lament, their burden can be shared, if not lightened.